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Shadow in the Heart
T/N: Translated by Jen on Broken Jinsei! Please do not repost my translations! All translations outside of Broken Jinsei are stolen and reposted without permission!
Although her head ached, she still needed to face. Of course, Jing Wan has never thought about pretending to be an ostrich and not go meet him. On one hand, the consequences certainly will be even more serious, and on the other hand, in Jing Wan’s philosophy, if there’s a problem, then it needs to be resolved. Dragging it on, or doing something else, was absolutely unacceptable. Moreover, that was her other half, seeing him uncomfortable and uneasy, Jing Wan was truly unable to be happy too.
As for the people that found them, how to explain to them, no matter what, all didn’t need for her to personally appear, no?
Just, when Jing Wan found her way back, Li Hong Yuan wasn’t in the room. Seemingly, this anger really was extraordinary intense.
After inquiring, turns out, no one knew where he went. The bodyguards that stayed behind, they all more or less had injuries on them, but this wasn’t an excuse for them to rest. The reason why no one followed after was completely because a certain someone didn’t allow it. That appearance like he was about to devour someone really wasn’t something an ordinary person can withstand, and they usually will always unconditionally follow orders, so at this time, they can only hang their heads and stand before Jing Wan. However, whether or not it was their responsibility, to have not been able to guard by master’s side, it was precisely their negligence.
“It’s not your fault. Send people to look around.” Jing Wan rubbed her swollen temples.
Jing Wan and them rather weren’t worried, but for the people that just came looking, as soon as they heard Jin Qinwang was missing, they just nearly crumbled. One has to know, precisely because of these last few days, facing the high pressure from above, one was practically about to have one’s life thrown in, unable to eat well, unable to sleep well, the hair falling clump by clump. After seeing the person at last, their suspended heart finally returning to its original place, something like this happens. This heart of theirs really can’t withstand anymore. Even if that breath still haven’t rested, they still hurriedly went searching for the person.
Because they weren’t familiar with the water fort, each and every one all were like headless flies scrambling about. The people of the water fort were confused, what were they doing?
Afterwards, they had the water fort turned inside out, yet still didn’t see the person. When reporting back before Jing Wan, Jing Wan was extremely speechless, “The people of the water fort are more familiar with the place than you all. With several hundred people, there should at least be someone that has seen wangye’s whereabouts, so don’t you all know to open your mouth and ask? Instead you all just headlessly and brainlessly stumble as you randomly look around like this?”
Everyone’s complexion was quite interesting. This purely was because they were too worried, and completely forgot. This while, they were too ashamed to even show their faces.
Just as expected, after randomly asking, they just learned Li Hong Yuan’s whereabouts, having left the water fort and entered the mountains. As such, they couldn’t sit still anymore, urgently going to search again. They’d came from the middle of the mountain ridge, and although they didn’t enter very deeply, and for the most part, can be considered to have walked the shortest route reaching the water fort, they still deeply sensed the dangers inside.
In contrast, Jing Wan was actually very calm. Within a set range near the water fort, there certainly won’t be overly dangerous things existing. Li Hong Yuan’s skills, she although has never distinctly witnessed before, she has seen him kill before, further having the accomplishment of singlehandedly fighting a tiger. As such, how can he be weak? Ordinary dangers simply were unable to affect him.
Jing Wan carefully inquired the situation in that direction, learning that that place was actually a col[1], roughly two li in length. Not far from the end, there was a neither big nor small lake, and under normal circumstances, there were some small animals that roamed about. Because the people of the water fort frequently hunted, for the most part, within five li, there all weren’t any large beasts.
Jing Wan thanked them, and afterwards, found two other people to lead the way, entering the mountain together to look for the person.
According to their meaning, it was letting Jing Wan not go, but Jing Wan just replied with: “Are you all sure you can have wangye ‘brought’ back?”
Alright, they all made out Jing Wan’s meaning, finding wasn’t the important part, but rather, letting him come back after finding him was the important part. For every single one of them, they all didn’t dare to say a single word, so how can they let him come back. Moreover, anyone with a discerning eye could all tell, wangye had overturned the vinegar jar, so if not wangfei personally setting out, them going forward, that was a hundred percent looking to be skinned.
Jing Wan right now also wasn’t wearing the cumbersome formal gown. The entire suit of plain cotton clothing was tailored very cleanly. It was just going up a mountain, not like one needed to climb a steep cliff, small case.
They divided into two groups, the majority scattering ahead first to go look for Li Hong Yuan, while the people behind protected Jing Wan as she followed after.
TN: All translations outside of Broken Jinsei are stolen and reposted without permission!
They originally thought that the party behind would be very slow. After all, a wangfei, noble and esteemed, very much delicate, walking along in the mountains, how can she be quick? Perhaps after walking a few extra steps, she’ll be gasping for breath. As a result, they very quickly just discovered, they’d thought too much. Jin Wangfei’s speed wasn’t slower by much.
Jin Qinwang might have not walked along the col, but rather went up the mountains on the two sides. However, this kind of assumption didn’t happen. The people in front very quickly just passed on news that they’d already found the person, right by the lake. However, they didn’t dare to disturb him.
The vegetation in the col were all relatively short and small, but as they got closer to the lake, the trees started to become tall and lush. However, at most it was just about a few feet tall, far from the giant trees that reached the sky.
Passing through between the trees, Jing Wan also vaguely saw Li Hong Yuan’s figure, bending one leg as he sat on a rock by the lake, strangely feeling a bit desolate. Jing Wan’s heart subconsciously clenched, and her pace also instinctively increased. As for the others, they all perceptively stopped, dispersing all in directions, ensuring that they can’t see and also can’t hear, having all dangers separated out.
Towards the sound of Jing Wan’s footsteps, Li Hong Yuan couldn’t be more familiar, but he still motionlessly sat there. However, the emotions, as well as malice and calculations that flickered through his eyes, only he himself knew. Actually, he was very clear, regardless of whether it was Sun Yi Lin or Chen Zheng Min, all can’t die. At least, they can’t die in his hands. Between Jing Wan and him, there weren’t any barriers to begin with originally. If he were to kill them, it would instead create estrangement. Perhaps it won’t go as far as to be impossible to reconcile, but in Jing Wan’s heart, there certainly will be a knot.
Moreover, just as Jing Wan said herself, she probably really will remember for a lifetime, and how could he allow such a thing? As such, the conflict would only grow more and more deep, and towards the end, it might even grow out of control. This definitely wasn’t something he was willing to see. Whoever makes him annoyed, if he can’t kill, then he’ll just payback by ten-fold, a hundred-fold.
Have to say, Li Hong Yuan right now was the most insane, but also the most rational. A lunatic wasn’t scary, and a rational person also wasn’t scary, but a rational lunatic was nevertheless quite scary.
Jing Wan approached, reaching out and putting her hand on his shoulder, “Ah Yuan………”
Li Hong Yuan was still aloof.
“Still angry?” Jing Wan was actually a bit helpless. She clearly knew what he cared about, but this problem, at present, simply had no way of resolving, so no matter what was said, it was all useless. Extending her hand, she hugged him from behind, her cheek leaning against the side of his head, “Sorry.”
Li Hong Yuan blanked, “Why?” The one that didn’t have any reason to apologize the most was precisely her. At least it wasn’t likely to be for Sun Yi Lin’s sake, because that way, he’ll really want to kill the person. Would Wan Wan be this stupid?
“As a wife, to be unable to let one’s husband have a hundred percent sense of security, could it be that it’s not my fault?”
Truthfully speaking, towards the phrase ‘sense of security’, Li Hong Yuan wasn’t able to comprehend all that well, at most just roughly guessing according to the context. If he were to understand it completely, he probably really would’ve exploded. “Nothing to do with Wan Wan. I shouldn’t have taken my anger out on you. The one that should say sorry is me, but Wan Wan, I can’t control myself. I can’t allow anyone to peep at you. Even if knowing that they absolutely can’t take you away from my side, I still won’t allow it.”
(T/N: ‘安全感’ sense of security, this is a relatively contemporary phrase, so as an ancient person, Li Hong Yuan won’t really know the word.)
“En, I know.” In reality, as a man raised under the traditional Confucian teachings, nine out of ten men afraid all weren’t able to tolerate this kind of thing, and would even, because of this, take their anger out on women, not trusting women, doing something that made one very much despise, and afterwards, uselessly repent in hindsight, a look of deeply regretting, too painful to continue living, just like for example, Le Cheng Emperor, truly making one very much disgusted.
Li Hong Yuan pulled over her hand, and Jing Wan conveniently stepped on the rock, walking in front of him and cuddling in his embrace.
Li Hong Yuan deliberately controlled himself, from beginning to end, not letting Jing Wan notice his eyes. Although he couldn’t see himself, he was still very clear that his eyes at this very moment were very scary.
After quietly sitting for a while, Jing Wan’s attention finally shifted away from him a little, “The scenery here is not bad.”
Li Hong Yuan swept a glance, “En.” He nonchalantly replied. No matter how beautiful the scenery, it still can’t cover up his gloomy heart.
The time wasn’t considered early to begin with, so this while, the sky actually formed beautiful fiery clouds, and when inverted upon the lake surface, it appeared exceptionally beautiful.
Seeing this scenery, Jing Wan momentarily forgot the vexing matters, just that quietly, occasionally saying a few words, time quietly passing, the sky darkening more and more.
“Ah Yuan, let’s go back.”
“Alright.”
Seeing their movements, the people in the surrounding also slowly gathered together. The two of them walked in the very front hand in hand, and the others followed behind them, maintaining a distance of more than ten feet.
When they returned to the water fort, the starry lights were already lit. Seeing them return, everyone was all quite happy.
At night, Li Hong Yuan met with the high-ranking military officers for this expedition, neither saltily nor dully encouraging a few words. Because they’d long heard of Li Hong Yuan’s Enma-like behavior, this time, they were instead in reverence from fear, overwhelmed by the sudden favor.
Li Hong Yuan declined to comment. He wasn’t someone that would consider someone else’s mood, “Already let someone inform your superior?”
“Yes, at the latest tomorrow morning, they will come pick up wangye.”
“After this many days, have you all investigated clearly who attacked this prince?”
That military officer’s forehead was somewhat drenched in sweat, “Replying to wangye, this lowly officer, along with Regional Inspector Sun, is in charge of…………” Speaking to here, he suddenly recalled, that Gentleman Sun was constantly thinking about Jin Wangfei, causing Jin Qinwang’s jealousy to explode. Mentioning him now, was it wanting to die, or wanting to die? But these words also can’t be said halfway, so one could only, harden one’s head and continue, “……….searching for wangye’s whereabouts. The other matters, this lowly officer temporarily doesn’t know, asking wangye to please forgive.” In reality, it’s not that he didn’t know, but rather, there wasn’t the slightest progress. The colleagues in charge of this matter, as well as the various high ranking officials, their hair were already white from worry. Fortunately, Jin Qinwang had immense good fortune, having yet to suffer injury, else his Majesty’s fury, they really won’t be able to withstand.
“Why don’t you withdraw.”
“Yes.” It was just over with like this? The military officer that retreated out let out a breath. A gust of wind brushed by, just feeling his back cold and chilly. Turns out, it’d long been drenched by sweat.
This while, Jing Wan had already went to sleep. Li Hong Yuan gazed upon the lantern fire, somewhat lost in thought.
The Pei clan leader wished to meet.
Perhaps having nothing to do, Li Hong Yuan actually met with him.
The Pei clan leader perfunctorily bowed, “All say Jin Qinwang is free-spirited and likes beauties, yet turns out, to be an infatuated kind. This truly is surprising, even to the degree where you need to wrong yourself. All say, ‘the endless passionate romance, the hero’s short breath[2]‘. When reflecting on Jin Qinwang, one can’t help but feel disappointed.”
“Disappointed towards this prince, so the surviving members of the previous imperial family, presumably has made Pei clan leader very satisfied.”
The Pei clan leader was startled, “This old man doesn’t know what wangye is saying.” Although making every effort to conceal, he truly was quite alarmed.
“Get lost!”
The fist in the Pei clan leader’s sleeve tightly clenched, “Wangye’s mood must not be good, as such, this old one will take one’s leave first.”
[1] Col – The lowest point on a mountain ridge between two peaks, also known as gaps. The literal translation of its chinese name ‘山坳’ is ‘mountain indention’.
[2] Similar to the phrase, ‘the warm gentle home, the hero’s grave’; the meaning is roughly how being immersed in romance will kill ambition, mainly for men. The concept is roughly based on how a hero is someone who is revered and looked up to, so they shouldn’t sink down to the same level as an ordinary person and immerse in romance, hence romance will cause a hero to be ‘short-lived’. The line comes from ‘Record of the Shore’ (水浒记) by Xu Zi Chang of the Ming dynasty.
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I wish someone will physically hit the Pei clan leader’s face.